Woman lets newly-single sister stay with her rent-free, she sleeps until 1pm and get angry when sister makes her 7 and 4-year-olds breakfast: 'Wake up and take care of your [...] kids'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Jul 1, 2025 10:00 PM EDT

Everybody goes through tough times here and there. We wouldn't be human if we didn't. We all have moments when we need a little extra support from those around us. And if you haven't had that yet, it's coming for you. We're allowed to lean on each other when we need to. Plus, in my experience, the people we love don't mind being leaned on. It makes them feel useful. Plus, they know that you would do it for them if and when they need it. But how far does this generosity go? What about when the person that needs help is a parent? Do their parental duties ease up when they're suffering?

Being a parent is a 24-7 job. It doesn't stop when you go to sleep. It doesn't stop when you go on vacation. You're always their parent. But when you need help with them, do you have a say about how they do it? 

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  • 01

    AITA for not cooking breakfast for my niece and nephew?

    My (36, M) sister (34, F) moved into my house about 2 months ago with her 2 kids (7M, 4F) after she ended a really bad relationship
    via u/WinAffectionate326
  • 02
    Cheezburger Image 10522637056
    via Unsplash+ (A. C.)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Those are the questions that came up in this story where a mom of two young kids was going through a rough time. When she moved in with her sister, her sister took on a lot of responsibility. But then she had a problem with the kind of responsibility she was taking on. Read on for the details.

  • 03
    I've always been an early-ish riser and like to get up and make myself some breakfast around 7 or 8am. Nothing spectacular, just whatever I felt like that day When my sister moved in, I realized quickly that she liked to sleep in. Some days she was up as late as 1pm...I gave her the benefit of the doubt since I knew how hard her break up was for her
    via u/WinAffectionate326
  • 04
    Since my sister slept so late daily, she wouldn't get up and take care of her kids. I got into a routine with my niece and nephew that basically whatever I cooked myself for breakfast, I'd make enough for them as well until the other morning I woke up and had an urge to make huevos rancheros. The kids immediately started complaining that they didn't want that and wanted something different
    via u/WinAffectionate326
  • 05
    I was nice and ended up making them pancakes since it's not their fault that their mom is really struggling The next morning, I was making breakfast potatoes and eggs but all I heard was "we don't want that. We want something different" so again, I obliged...finally after 3 mornings of my unwanted food critics getting a
    via u/WinAffectionate326
  • 06
    separate meal, I finally told them "I'm no longer cooking 2 different meals for breakfast. If you don't like what I'm making, go ask your mom to get up and do it" So, they went upstairs to wake her up, but she still didn't come downstairs until after 1pm. The kids immediately started complaining that I "refused to feed them" and my sister was PED
    via u/WinAffectionate326
  • 07
    She started in about how they need to be fed by a certain time and a bunch of other things that she said to try and intentionally hurt me I snapped and told her "look I know you're depr sed, but wake up and take care of your fu**ing kids instead of expecting me to do it"
    via u/WinAffectionate326
  • 08
    She got quiet after that and is still giving me the cold shoulder, but I know she's expecting me to apologize. Sorry this was long winded, but let me have it. AITA?
    via u/WinAffectionate326
  • 09

    Commenters laid out who they thought was in the wrong here.

    mrmses 2h ago . Sleeping till 1pm means she's missing their breakfast AND lunch. Ages 7 and 4 and still pretty dependent on an adult for balanced meals. Your sister is lame.
    via u/mrmses
  • 10
    Zazzog 2h ago . NTA. Number one, you're right. Despite anything she's going through, your sister is still the childrens' mother, and they're her responsibility. It's unfair of her to expect you to make them breakfast so she can sleep in.
    via u/Zazzog
  • 11
    Number two, it's very kind of you to cook for them anyway, but that doesn't mean you have to go out of your way. There's nothing wrong with expecting the kids to eat what you're making. You're not a short order cook.
    via u/Zazzog
  • 12
    Finally, in my experience, always cooking what the kids ask for is a quick way to turn them into overly picky eaters.
    via u/Zazzog
  • 13
    LynnBarr123 • 2h ago NTA - you said it yourself: "look I know you're depr sed, but wake up and take care of your fu**ing kids instead of expecting me to do it" I'm assuming she is not paying rent or helping you with any expenses - she is just laying around sleeping? You should have a serious sit-down with her and stop all of this crop right now.
    via u/LynnBarr123
  • 14
    Rade-Organization782 • 2h ago . DO NOT APOLOGISE!!!!! What ever you do, do NOT apologise.. We all have hard times in life, many struggle with mental health too. That's not an excuse to neglect your children. 4 year olds need supervising, I may add.
    via u/R*de-Organization782
  • 15
    She's gotten used to you waiting on her kids, and how dare she even consider laying into you. Who does she think she is? Her children are her responsibility, you've been kind enough to give her and her children a roof, you've taken care of her kids for a period of time, allowing her time and space to get her head together. Now she needs to get her head out of her and start taking care of her children.
    via u/R*de-Organization782
  • 16
    I'd start waking her up by whatever time she said her children need feeding by. Remind her her that her children need feeding, and that is her responsibility. Have her start pulling her weight in the house and contributing financially (if she isn't already, which I doubt she is). NTA.
    via u/R*de-Organization782
  • 17
    Cheezburger Image 10522637568
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 18
    Awkward_Chest9310 2h ago NTA . I've been in your position and I've been a depr sed mother before. You don't owe her an apology. I think you need to have a conversation with your sister about boundaries and expectations. If she's not okay with that then she needs to find somewhere else to recover.
    via u/Awkward_Chest9310
  • 19
    Wonderful_Two_6710 2h ago NTA. She may be depr sed, but her kids need their mom.
    via u/Wonderful_Two_6710
  • 20
    Origina... • • 2h ago Edited 2h ago I'm sure you know you're NTA. She doesn't get to sleep through her obligations as a mother. I have severe, often crippling, depre son, but, I have responsibilities and pets to care for, so, I get up to do that. She can always go back to bed later.
    via u/Original_Pythonette
  • 21
    Dixieland_Insanity • 2h ago NTA Do NOT apologize for what you said. You didn't sign up to be anyone's short order cook for breakfast or any other meals. They can be happy with what you make or wake their mother. You didn't refuse to feed them. You refused to cook two completely separate meals to fulfill their demands.
    via u/Dixieland_Insanity
  • 22
    You need to sit down with your sister and lay out a time frame for when she will have a job and have the funds to leave. Don't agree to being her babysitter for this. She needs to figure out childcare as well. She didn't stop having responsibility for her kids. because she went through a
    via u/Dixieland_Insanity
  • 23
    breakup. You have given her plenty of time to pull herself together and start moving forward. You don't say how long they've been living with you but I'm guessing it's been several weeks. *Corrected below. You gave all 3 of them a dose of tough love that was warranted and necessary. Stand your ground.
    via u/Dixieland_Insanity
  • 24
    ETA: Correction, your sister has had 2 months to get herself together after the breakup. That's enough time to at least be taking care of her children's basic needs.
    via u/Dixieland_Insanity
  • 25
    Effective-Several 2h ago NTA. . If it's so important to your sister that her kids get fed at a certain time, tell her she needs to set an alarm clock so that she gets her bt out of bed and she feeds them. Otherwise, her kids can eat
    via u/Effective-Several
  • 26
    what you make and quit complaining. Or her kids can refuse to eat what you make, and they can go upstairs and they can get her bt out of bed. You might want to make plans for her to move out.
    via u/Effective-Several
  • 27
    o2low 2h ago • NTA. You have been more than gracious babysitting her kids every morning. Instead of thanking you, she's about it. You aren't required to feed her kids and you certainly aren't required to feed them whatever the h I they woke up wanting.
    via u/o2low
  • 28
    Cereal. They can have cereal and make that themselves at least! Your sister needs to pull her head out of her a
    via u/o2low
  • 29
    • Extreme-Egg-8782 · 2h ago W is bailing on breakfast, lunch, and whatever trouble they might get into. When you're a parent, you don't get to sleep until 1pm. Doesn't matter if you're sick, depr sed, or hungover.
    via u/Extreme-Egg-8782

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